Are You Guilty ?
How I Learned to Truly Enjoy My Day Off
Times are tough, aren't they? From the crazy politics to today's "cancel culture," sometimes, it's all too much! Not to mention what's happening in your own life! Is work killing you? How's your relationship? Are you able to get enough time to relax? It's so easy to get caught up in many problems that you just need to take a break from it all. To not let this negativity dominate your mind and physically, mentally, and emotionally drain you. But how exactly do you fight it off? Let me share my experience with you and some helpful steps to keep your mental health in check while you're at home.
My Struggle with Stress on My Days Off
First things first, I realized I wasn't alone in struggling with whatever challenges I was facing. To tackle a problem, you must first acknowledge its existence. This begins with you. It's easy to convince yourself that everything is fine to appear stronger to those around you, but this isn't helpful in the long run.
Maybe you're not telling your partner that your boss is overloading you at work, which is why you’re often up at night. Or perhaps you haven’t told your friends how their jokes about your appearance hurt you, even if they mean them playfully. Ignoring these issues and pushing them to the back of your mind can eventually lead to bigger mental health problems.
Why We Feel Stressed When We Should Be Relaxing
There are many reasons why people avoid confronting their mental health issues, from cultural differences to fear of public shame. While these concerns might seem valid, they shouldn’t stop you from prioritizing your mental well-being. The more honest you are about what you're going through, the better you'll feel. Your mental health is what truly matters.
In many cultures, there's an unspoken rule that being busy means you’re successful and productive. So, when you finally get a chance to take a break, you might feel guilty. What will people think? Will they assume you’re slacking off? This guilt is amplified if you work in an environment where overworking is seen as a badge of honor.
A lot of us also tie our self-worth to our jobs. From a young age, we’re praised for good grades and achievements, making us believe our value comes from being productive. As adults, we chase this validation at work, which makes setting boundaries really tough. It’s like trying to keep a dog from chasing a squirrel—almost impossible.
The Downside of Not Truly Relaxing
When I finally had a day off, I thought it was the perfect time to catch up on chores and social commitments. But piling up tasks for my day off just added more pressure. Setting unrealistic to-do lists left me feeling like I’d run a marathon when all I did was try to tackle the laundry and make dinner.
This relentless cycle of productivity and guilt leads to a serious work-life imbalance. It can result in poor sleep, minimal relaxation, long hours, and high stress levels. Psychologists frequently see people grappling with anxiety, depression, burnout, work-related stress, and low self-esteem.
How I Learned to Actually Chill Out
Learning to actually chill out is an ongoing journey, and I'm still on that path. At first, it was challenging because I always felt like I needed to be constantly doing something. But over time, I've started to recognize the importance of taking breaks and giving myself permission to relax. I've learned to appreciate small moments of calm and practice mindfulness, which helps me stay grounded. It’s a gradual process, and I’m still figuring it out, but I’m finding that each step forward, no matter how small, helps me embrace a more relaxed mindset.
Focus on Alternatives
Instead of fixating on what not to do (like work), I planned specific activities to enjoy during my time away. Whether it’s scheduling personal training sessions after work or committing to volunteer work on weekends, filling my schedule with activities that engaged me outside of work helped a lot.
Combat Intrusive Thoughts
If work thoughts persisted, I had a diversion plan ready. I kept a novel handy, solved a crossword puzzle, or called a friend for a chat. For deeper anxieties, I jotted down my concerns in a notebook for a designated 10-minute "worry session." Externalizing worries often helps alleviate their intensity.
Change Your Environment
Just as a smoker removes cigarettes to quit, I turned off my devices completely during downtime. I made it inconvenient to check work emails by keeping my phone off. I created a designated non-work space at home—a cozy nook for reading or yoga—to reinforce mental separation from work.
Enlist Support
I involved family and friends in my effort to disconnect. I gave them permission to remind me to unplug and join activities that distracted me from work-related thoughts. Their support strengthened my resolve to maintain boundaries.
Confront Anxiety Gradually
If the fear of missing out on work issues haunted me, I challenged it gradually. I started by skipping nightly email checks and observed that work tasks remained manageable the next day. I extended this practice to weekends or even full weekends off to build confidence in my ability to step away without catastrophe.
By implementing these strategies and gradually adjusting my habits, I reclaimed my time away from work and returned refreshed and more focused. True relaxation and recharge are essential for sustained productivity and overall well-being.
Join the Conversation!
What about you? Do you find it hard to relax on your days off? Have you tried any of these tips? Share your experiences in the comments below. Let’s help each other out with ideas and support!
Feel free to leave a comment with your own tips or struggles with day-off anxiety. Have you found other ways to relax that work well for you? Let’s discuss!
